On Embarrassing Songs I Sing....

When I was in sixth grade, I had a really hard time remembering all of the names and dates I needed to know from European history (all the Louie's and Henry's) and such, so I put my notes to a Britney Spears song ("Hit Me Baby One More Time," if I remember correctly).  To make my history students a little more invested in learning our new unit, I thought it would be fun to give them an assignment reminiscent of my Britney/Notes compilation. Like any good teacher, of course I had to model this assignment first, which is where the ridiculous came in. And it follows:

Thursday, 10:20pm: I begin recording my song, having pulled up the karaoke version on youtube.

Thursday, 10:26pm: Roommate sends me this message--

Thursday, 10:45pm: Roommate and I are hysterical as we listen to "attempt #1." We decide unanimously that I should record "attempt #2."

Thursday, 11:28pm: I am finally satisfied (and just worn down) that I have something acceptable to be heard by my students. I have accepted the fact that they will most likely ridicule anything I bring in.

Friday, 9:50am: I debut this song to mixed acclaim:

"My Bank" by Stephanie Sefcik (music by the Black Eyed Peas)



Here are the lyrics, in case you want to follow along.

“My Bank”

What you gon’ do bout all that debt?

All that debt after the war?

I’ma make, make, make, make some cash

Make some cash from my new bank.

My bank, my bank, my bank, my bank, my bank.

My bank, my bank, my bank, my bank, my bank. (Check it out)

Ole G ‘Dub got me spendin’

My homie’s on the Benjamin,

I need to fix this crisis,

And lower all the prices.

TJ and James Madison

John Jay and George Washington

Harpin, they be

My patience—it be wearin’ thin,

So Congress, I ain’t askin,

I need a bank real quick and then

Gonna print me some dough

Keep the tax on the downlow

So I made the bank

And now I’m still makin bank

An’ I can keep on printing

My bills I print earn interest in

My bank, my bank, my bank, my bank

You just can’t help but use

My bank, my bank, my bank

My bank, it’s got you

He got us spending,

(Oh) Spendin’ all your taxes on me

and buying bonds from me.

He’s got a charter

(Oh) Just for 20 years,

a charter, a charter

What you gon’ do with all that gold?

All that gold inside your hold?

I’ma loan, loan, loan, loan it out

Loan it out to the rich folk.

What you gon' do with all that stock?

All $10 million of that stock?

I'ma make, make, make, make you buy

Make you buy, make you buy

Cos of my debt, my debt, my debt, my debt (what)

And you will have no choice

I'm a monopoly (federal)

I'm just a guy, trying to make law

My name is T, T, T-J, let's go.

I got slaves, and lots of money

Let's talk foreign countries.

I like France, and I buy their stuff,

Frenchie, Frenchie imports

I like France, and I buy their stuff, 

Frenchie imports riiight.

They say I am a hypocrite 

But I just have opinions and

They always judging what I say

Can't decide on just one way

Gotta run my farm--

I don't want to do no harm

I can write and I can speak 

I lost to Adams and I 

Want to win it

Want to, want to win it

I'ma win this, you can't stop the TJ

So just vote for the man

Democrat-Republican

I'm just running government

to win the vote.

The vote to make me win.

I'm gonna be the man

The Presidential man

BAM!